Guardianship and Trusteeship - What are the Differences?

When it comes time to minding your parental matters, you may do so voluntarily or by legal appointment as either guardian or trustee, or both. While I am not a lawyer, I know and understand that these two terms can be easily confused. Here is a nutshell definition of each:

A guardian will become responsible for a dependent adult's lifestyle choices (e.g. where he/she lives and who can care for him her).

A trustee will become responsible for a dependent adult's financial matters (e.g. collecting income tax slips, making investment decisions and accounting for purchases made with using the dependent adult's own money).

As either a guardian or trustee, you will receive official court-issued orders. You will need to distribute these orders to others for them to retain in their files - for instance, such as one to your parent's doctor's office, your parent's bank, your parent's long-term care centre and so on.

Guardianship and trusteeship are very different levels of care so it is vital to differentiate between them. You may learn at a wrong time that you do not have the authority to make a key decision.

As a guardian or trustee, you must also be completely trustworthy, ethical and hold integrity.. Your parents will frequently appoint their own trustees (commonly, the oldest child); however, such decisions can be overturned if necessary. Please keep in mind that overturning a trusteeship can be a complicated - and, potentially, a very messy matter so proceed with this decision only when there is no other choice.

To learn more about guardianship and/or trusteeship, please consult with a lawyer. You may also want to approach local senior's associations for help. My family discovered a senior's association in our city which featured a person on-staff who guided us along the way. With this "desk method", the family was responsible for serving the documents and so on, but the cost-savings were significant.

Managing Parental Posessions When Moving

Moving an aging parent into a care facility can be difficult enough; however, what do you do with all the accumulated "stuff" which Mom or Dad owns? There won't be much additional room for storage or family keepsakes at Mom or Dad's new home so you will have to do something with it all. As someone who has helped to move my parents numerous times in their later years, here are just a few ideas which can help you:

Store it: Explore the options for local storage in your city or town. Here, you can rent a storage locker (various sizes are typically available) for either a short or long-term time period. While this is not the ideal answer as the monthly storage charges can add up quickly, you can buy some time until you make some more permanent decisions with what to do with these items.

Donate it: Is there a community service centre/association in your area which can use your parent's old couch or bookshelf? Call around to inquire ... maybe you'll even find someone who will offer pick-up? This will save you both time and effort.

Delegate it: Can you find a new home for any of Mom or Dad's possessions? Is there someone in your family or a neighbour's youngster who has just moved out? That microwave oven or television set could be greatly appreciated by someone just setting up a first apartment.

Discard it: While you may have great sentimental attachment to Mom or Dad's possessions, you must be realistic. You will not be able to keep the full collection of items yourself (although holding onto a number of smaller keepsakes can be a good thing). Work through all of what Mom or Dad owns ... if you do not want something or if you cannot donate or delegate it, then discard it.

By minimizing the amount of parental "stuff", you can reduce your personal stress level.

Protecting Those under Your Care from Scams

Unscrupulous people are, unfortunately, everywhere. They are like vultures perched on tree branches, just waiting to jump on the unsuspecting. Scam artists are increasingly targeting seniors who will not have the personal strength to defend themselves and may not even be able to cry out for help. Seniors going shopping for goods and/or services can also be susceptible. As a caregiver, it becomes your responsibility to watch out for your loved one and protect him/her from being taken advantage of. These are just a few ideas of how to do so:

• Window shop – Whether you are looking for prescriptions, clothes or adaptive equipment, it pays to shop around. Not all retailers will charge the same price for goods. Surprisingly, prices can even vary (quite dramatically) on products sold in stores from the same chain. By telephoning stores to compare prices on products/services available, you can save yourself a lot of time and unnecessary driving around.

• Screen service providers – Anybody coming into Mom/Dad’s home to help out should be checked out thoroughly, Conducting an in-depth interview is a good start, but ensure that you ask for – and follow-up with – a minimum of three professional references. When contacting these references, ask pointed questions … one of my favourites is “Would you hire this person to care for your own Mom or Dad?”. Agencies which provide healthcare staff should make certain that all staff have undergone a criminal check and are bonded.

• Know who you are buying from. Is the sales person or the company familiar to you? Avoid any door-to-door sales people or telemarketers who ask for a cash deposit up-front for a product/service. Don’t give out any personal information (either your own or your parent’s) to someone you don’t recognize. If anything sounds too good to be true, chances are good that this is the case. Any necessary home renovations (e.g. a wheelchair ramp) should be installed/constructed by a reputable contractor. Before hiring a contractor, once again, ask for references from previous jobs done. Call up the Better Business Bureau to check on a contractor’s background. Do not deal with anybody who has a service complaint made against them.

Everybody Has Parents

I recently participated in a local writer's conference with exhibiting in their "Artist's Marketplace" - a place where individuals could promote their products/services for sale to conference attendees. Of the approximately 20 tables set up, the majority of exhibitors were showcasing books for or about writers, so I felt slightly out of place ... my guidebook is about caregiving instead!

At the end of the day, it turned out that my conference experiment turned out to be quite successful ... I had signed and sold eight copies of my book as well as spoken to a good number of interested attendees. Even though I may not sell a copy of my book to others immediately, I am pleased to even introduce the book to others ... I have realized that purchasing my book is a timing decision. Someone may not need it right now; however, he/she may well need it in six/12 months from now.

Through my conference participation, I also was reminded that everybody, no matter what their background, has parents and may well become caregivers in the months or years ahead. Eldercare is an issue which can affect us all. If, and when, you become a caregiver for an aging senior, prepare (as much as possible), take some respite time for yourself as well as seek out and delegate help.